Tonight, however, was a night for celebration. Chris and I went out for a drink with some of my dearest friends. My friend and bridesmaid Chelsea and her boyfriend, bridesmaid Nicole, and high school friend Chris G. We tried out a new place here in our hometown that opened up recently and attempts to cater to the 21–30 age range. Unfortunately, Nicole is deathly allergic to peanuts, and they serve peanuts on every table and shells cover the floor. After our first drink, Nicole was having a horrible time with the atmosphere, so we moved our celebration to the local Elephant Bar for late-night happy hour. We started off with a Washington Apple shot for the birthday kids: Chris G, Nicole, and I (Oct. 28, Nov. 6, and Nov. 13, respectively). Then we had a round of cactus coolers, a shot of mandarin vodka dropped into Red Bull. Tasty! We finished off the night with another round of shots, and now I am sitting here writing this post. (Thank goodness for spell check.)

Chris and I are currently in the process of putting our room back together and moving back upstairs after living in the downstairs guest room all summer. We painted the walls a warm cream color last week, and over the weekend I shampooed the carpet and picked up new nightstands. I’m really excited to turn our room into our space, and once its all done, I’ll be sure to share more about it with all of you.

Right now, the thing I’m looking forward to most is my birthday. Not only will my sister (who lives halfway around the globe in England) be in San Diego for my birthday this year, my best friend Fletch is flying in from San Francisco for the weekend. Since my birthday last year ended up not going as well as we had planned, I’m really happy that I’m going to be able spend this one with the people who matter the most to me. Don’t tell my dad, but I’m planning to get some professional shots taken with my sister to give him for his birthday, which is two weeks to the day after mine. He only gets to see his daughters together once every five years or so, so giving him a way to keep us with him would mean the world to him. I can’t wait to surprise him!

Things are about to get hectic, but I have more wedding stuff to share before I go off the radar for a little while. Thank you for being patient with me while I get caught up with the real world. I love each and every one of you. Really, I do.

Any other Scorpios out there prepping for birthday celebrations? Am I the only one who has the winter blues when it drops below 70?

This photo took my breath away as the website loaded on my screen. As I clicked through the pages, I knew we had to visit the venue in person. I love the fact that they are a full service venue. They are a totally private venue and they only do one wedding per day. They include the ceremony, reception, rehearsal, catering, cake, tables, chairs, linens, flatware, set up, teardown.… well, basically 90% of what goes into a wedding. Its a flat rate per person, depending on which package you pick (they do custom packages too!). Two perks of being a Twin Oaks bride? First– working with a wedding planner is included in every package. You meet with them a few times before the wedding, and they’re there the day of to make sure things run smoothly. Second, they have a design center that you have access to for $1 per guest. You can use any pieces they have for decor, so you don’t have to buy 20 candelabras that you might never use again. I’m excited to see what they have available and how I might use it!

I was obsessed, but we had a crazy busy summer and had to wait to schedule a visit. Mr. Mog and I were planning a weekend trip to San Diego for MOH LoFletch’s birthday in August, so I called the venue a few days before we left on the off chance we could stop by and check it out. We were in luck! They had a cancellation for a tour so we could see the venue Saturday afternoon!

The morning of the tour, we had breakfast with a friend and then headed for the venue. We were excited that the venue was easy to find, and from the second we pulled into the driveway, I had eyes like dinner plates. I wanted to take it all in, so I snapped photo after photo on my iPhone while Mr. Mog took video.

The girl who greeted us was polite, and led us around every area of the property. The grounds were so incredibly magical… None of us could find a single thing we didn’t like. It was THAT good. I was a little disappointed because we were unable to tour to bridal parlor (schoolhouse) because the bride had already arrived for the day. However, they showed me pictures of the inside and I was sure I would love it. We sat down the manager and talked pricing, and he was willing to work with us and our budget! By moving the wedding to a Friday, we saved almost $20 per person (and that’s including taxes, tips, and fees) and he threw in a few upgrades. It was so easy to imagine marrying Mr. Mog there, and we were both sure that we wouldn’t be able to find anywhere to top it.

Alright, enough talk. Here are some of the pictures that I took during our tour!

Here is the beautiful schoolhouse and bridal parlor. Can you say photo op?!

Here is where the Mogwais will be exchanging vows. Don’t you just love the gorgeous fountain behind the arbor?

This chalkboard is placed in one of the entrance arbors to the ceremony area. We can ask them to write anything we like, and they add special touches based on your theme! Such a lovely touch.

This is typically where the cocktail hour would be held. The day we visited, guests were relaxing here before the ceremony as well. I love the cute wicker furniture and that lamppost!

The bar at Twin Oaks was shipped over from England and is circa the early 1900’s (can’t remember exactly). I think it is so charming!

These adorable little chandeliers are hanging over the bar area. They’re just to die for!

The reception tent at Twin Oaks is simply gorgeous. I love those chandeliers, and at night, the venue does custom uplighting on the tent lining that makes it really magical. We want a warm amber and blue feel, and (somehow) we’d like to project stars onto the lining. More on that later!

So there you have it. In the months since our visit to Twin Oaks, I have researched other venues in hopes that we may be able to save some money by doing things the more “traditional” way, I suppose, and hiring our own vendors to take care of catering and rentals. None of the other venues in the running had the same magical charm that had captured my heart at Twin Oaks. They were too formal, too modern, or just not quite right for what we wanted. We still have to pay for the bar, a florist, the photographer, and entertainment, but I’m glad we won’t have to worry about coordinating 20 different vendors on our wedding day.

Did you decide to book the first venue you visited? How did you know it was “the one”?

seriousland

Seriously though, when Mr. Mogwai picked me up from work last night, he told me that he found a song he thought I would like. This is a common proclamation from Mr. Mog, so I gave him an obligatory nod (despite my exhaustion from 4 days of 9 hour shifts) and took a listen. The song gave me goosebumps and took my breath away. I immediately turned to him and exclaimed “This needs to be our first dance as a married couple. NEEDS. TO. BE!!!” His eyes lit up and met mine, and it was decided, easy as that. We listened to it over and over again during the past 24 hours, and I love it more every time I hear it. My only quibble with it?? There are creepy children playing in the background during the last like 5 seconds of the song. Mr. Mog loves them, so I’ll get over it.

I know you’re probably dying to hear what we’ve picked, so let me share it with you!!

Forever and a Day (Acoustic) — Death By Stereo

Did you ever wonder, will I make it through this night?
Did you ever wonder, will I live for sacrifice?
Have you ever wondered, will I ever see the light?
Have you ever wondered, can I live another life?
Can I live another life?

I can’t take away this fever, I can’t take away the pain,
But I will fight with you forever, forever and a day
I can’t face this world on my own, I keep on searching for your face,
I promise that we’ll live forever, forever and a day
Forever and a day, forever and a day, forever and a day,
Forever and a day

So many parts of this song fit us and our relationship so perfectly. Neither Mr. Mog nor I have lived a “perfect life”. We’ve had tough times (to say the least… another post), and we’ve had to fight most of our adult lives just to get to this point. This arrangement is so powerful. Everytime I hear it, I get a little bit choked up because I know this really is for forever and a day. I love Mr. Mogwai so much, and I am so lucky to have him and spend the rest of my life loving him!

Two additional notes: First, the band that sings this song is a pretty big part of the SoCal punk scene. Some of the guys in the band are friends of ours and we are hoping to invite some of them to the wedding. Any that we do will definitely get a tip off that we will be using their song. They’re all really cool guys… I’m sure they’ll be flattered. Second, I played this song for Daddio Mogwai today when he took me to lunch. He felt it might be a little bit dark for a wedding. While I respect him and his opinion, I think that’s one of the things I love about the song. We aren’t a “sunshine and rainbows” type of couple, and the traditional uppity power ballad just wouldn’t suit us. Mr. Mog has been playing in punk, metal, and hardcore bands for over fifteen years. Music is a huge part of our lives. I think when it comes to the first dance, what truly matters is finding a song that we really connect with, and this is it. I know that when it comes time to step out on that dance floor in front of our guests, we will be the only two people in the world listening to a song that brings us together.

What do you think of our song choice? Do you think its too dark for a wedding? Did anyone else use something less than traditional for their first dance?

I made an appointment with the first salon I visited a few months earlier. I was pleased to find that when I had an appointment, the service was wonderful and my consultant was a total sweetheart. I showed her a picture of the dress I was looking for and she went searching. She brought a few over that she thought might be the dress I was looking for. Third in the stack was my dress!! I headed into the dressing room and stepped into it.

As the consultant was zipping the dress up, I took a deep breath before looking at myself in the mirror. It’s true, that when you find the perfect dress, you feel it. It makes the whole hunt worth it.

Okay, I know, you want to know which it was. Without further ado…

Did you recognize dress number two?? Yes, I really bought the second dress I ever tried on. It just took me nine more dresses to figure it out!!

There were a few things that really sold me on this dress.

First, this dress cannot be ordered from the designer. Only one was made and I was lucky enough that the sample fit me almost perfectly! I wouldn’t need to spend much on alterations so I decided to splurge on the dress itself.

Second, the consultant told me the since I would be buying the sample, she could give me 20% off the dress. That dropped the $1295 price tag down to $1040, which they rounded down to $1000 (before tax). My daddy taught me to appreciate a good bargain!

Third, since I have so much time left before the wedding, the salon is allowing me to make payments on the dress on my own schedule. When I have extra money, I pay them what I can to make up for a missed month when money is tight. The salon has been so great and really worked with me to make sure the dress that I wear down the aisle is one that I really love.

Did you go back for a dress you had previously tried on? Am I the only one who couldn’t pull the trigger after only two dresses?

I met with the consultant, gave her my basic guidelines and a vague description of what I had in my head. She and my ladies went to pull a few dresses while I changed into the store’s corset and slip. How did it go? Well… Let’s just let the dresses speak for themselves!!

Oh, dress nine. I humored my friends with this pick. I’m pretty sure my face says it all when it comes to this dress. It went in the no pile. However, I will admit that I LOVE the way this dress photographs. Still, it just wasn’t right for me.

Believe it or not, these are photos of the same dress!! Dress ten is from David’s convertible collection. The outer skirt unhooks to reveal a shorter reception dress. While I absolutely LOVED the reception dress, I completely HATED the outer skirt. The material of it felt gross and hung weird. I was super bummed when the consultant informed me that that was the only outer skirt available for the dress. That meant it was time to move on.

Dress number eleven was the consultant’s pick. I really liked many aspects of the dress, but I didn’t love any of them. I didn’t eliminate this dress as I had with many of the others, but I never had the urge to return for it.

Luckily, it wasn’t an issue for very long. Having photographs of the dresses I tried on was something I was super excited about in the weeks after my visits to the salons. I was able to really look at each one and never had to wonder if I was remembering them correctly or not. I was pretty surprised when I discovered that dresses I initially liked, I began to lose interest in. However, I was much more surprised that dresses that I found unimpressive initially began to grow on me.

As time passed, I began thinking about my next shopping trip. As I hunted the Internet for more options, I began to realize that I was comparing everything I saw to a dress I had already tried on. A dress I couldn’t find anything like no matter how hard I tried. I knew I had to try it on again. I was worried that it might not be there when I returned for it, so I made an appointment for the following Friday afternoon.

Can you guess which dress had stolen my heart? Did anyone else return for a dress that you had originally written off?

The first time I saw myself in a wedding dress was a bewildering, shocking, beautiful experience. With my shiny new ring on my finger, I stood in front of that mirror and it hit me like a semi — I get to marry my best friend. I’m not sure I actually looked at the first few dresses. My head was still spinning and it took me a few tries to process everything and refocus on the task at hand. I’m SO glad BM LoLove was there taking photos of each dress.… You’ll see why soon enough!

The day after Mr. Mogwai and I were engaged, BM LoLove and I decided to check out a few of the local dress shops. You see, over the past three years I have dropped from approximately 190 lbs (size 13) to 140 lbs (size 7). While I knew I wasn’t ready to buy, I wanted to see different dress styles on my new frame so that I could narrow down my research. Unfortunately, the first shop we headed for had closed down over a year ago. BM LoLove suggested a shop she had passed a few days earlier on the other side of town.

When we arrived at the shop, we couldn’t find anyone to ask about trying on the dresses. We started browsing the racks, pulling dresses that fit my basic criteria: strapless or off the shoulder, no tulle, not foofy… Basically nothing too ridiculous. I’m very basic when it comes to my everyday style (v-necks, jeans, and sneakers make me a very happy mogwai). Finally, we tracked down a consultant, who informed us that she had an appointment, so the seamstress would be helping me into the gowns. I think she figured we weren’t serious buyers and didn’t want to waste her time.

The seamstress didn’t speak much English, but she was very kind and helped me into the dresses in the rear dressing room. I tried to pick out dresses that were very different in style, cut, and materials. BM LoLove also picked out a few, which I tried on simply to see if I loved it or hated it. Unfortunately, I don’t remember who picked which dresses!

Dress number one. It was a good starting place, but it didn’t do much for me. Of course, I probably wasn’t paying nearly enough attention to the details of the dress. Even so, I knew it was out.

Dress number two. I really, really liked this dress. However, with a $1300 price tag, I wasn’t sold. Little did I know, soon this photo would be getting a lot more attention from me very soon.

Dress number three. I thought the neckline was interesting, but otherwise I was extremely unimpressed. I changed out of it pretty quickly.

Dress number four had a very pretty bodice and the beading was exquisite. The skirt, however, looked and felt like a comforter. An outrageously high price tag pushed this bad boy right into the “no” pile.

Dress number five was one of BM LoLove’s picks. Unfortunately, the sample was a size too small, so we had to struggle to get it zipped. Once we did, I couldn’t take a breath! All I could do was stand there and sort of pant while LoLove snapped the photo. Then I gasped, “get me outta this thing!” While there are a lot of aspects I liked about this dress, I wasn’t sure it really suited my personality. LoLove agreed that while it was a beautiful dress (she even confessed that she’d like to wear something similar on her big day), it just wasn’t right for me.

Dress number six was just awful. It was far too big, so the seamstress clipped it on so I could get an idea of how it would look. Once again, I changed out of the dress fairly quickly and crossed it off my list.

Dress number seven was really cute on the hanger. On me, it hung oddly and didn’t make me feel even a tiny bit bridal. I was tired of trying on dresses so this one went into the “no” pile and I changed into normal clothes.

Overall, I’m really glad we decided to stop into this little salon. Even though the service was less than spectacular, I had a better idea of what I wanted in a dress than when I walked in. Which dress was your favorite?

Am I the only one who ran straight to the dress shop after getting engaged? Did anyone else do in-store research to improve the focus of your online research?

Mr. Mogwai and I met in December 2008. I had just turned 19 and broken up with a boyfriend a few weeks earlier. Finals that quarter were especially strenuous so after my last one was over, I was ready to celebrate! I decided to go with a friend to a holiday party he was attending in Inglewood, CA (for you non-left-coasters, that is about 2 hours south of where I live). When my friend and I arrived at the party, we found that many of the guests were running late. There were a few people there already, and they were standing around playing Guitar Hero (Mr. Mogwai was one of them!). After introducing myself, I pulled out a bottle of Jägermeister (my favorite drink) and poured a few shots for myself. As the night went on, I began to eye Mr. Mogwai because I thought he was cute. Later while he was outside smoking, I asked some of the girls if he was available or not. No one could tell me, so I decided to wait and see if I could strike up a conversation with him and do some recon.

Unbeknownst to me, one of the girls I had asked about him decided to save me the trouble and went outside and told him I thought he was cute. He came in and asked me if I could spare a shot for him. I jumped on the opportunity and said, “Of course!” Fast forward a few hours, I was leaving the restroom and there he was waiting for me in the hallway. I thought he needed to use it so I tried to get out of his way, but he pulled me aside and kissed me. We flirted for the next few hours over a few more drinks. I wasn’t driving home after drinking so I had planned on staying the night. His ride for the night left, so I drove him back to his car the next morning (45 minutes north to Reseda).

Things progressed pretty quickly from there, and we spent most of the next few weeks together (even though we lived 50 miles apart). On New Years Eve, he invited me to a party at his friend’s house in San Diego. At midnight, we kissed and he whispered in my ear how excited he was to start the new year with me. We’ve been together ever since.

Now for the backstory…

The afternoon of the party, Mr. Mogwai was at his friend’s house (GM Ollie… More on that in another post) in the valley. GM Ollie was seeing the girl who was hosting the party. The two of them were going to attend the party together. However, when GM Ollie’s roommate arrived to pick them up, she had his SO in tow. GM Ollie’s SO picked a fight with him and he took off, leaving Mr. Mogwai standing there with the girls and no option but to attend the party. He later told me that he had been planning on staying in that night with GM Ollie. If he had, there would be no Mr. and Miss Mogwai. Thanks GM Ollie!

Who I am: I’m a twenty-one year old web developer from southern California. I’m quirky and neurotic and love to have a good time with close friends. I’m one of the guys but I still enjoy getting pretty and going out with my girls. I’m a compulsive planner and I pay attention to details. I’m loyal to a fault and will do anything to help the people I care about.

Who he is: Mr. Mogwai is a thirty-one year old musician from San Diego, California. He’s scruffy and laid back but is secretly an uber nerd. He loves to make up stupid nicknames for me (mogwai, gizmo, lovebug, riceball, couscous, the list goes on and on). He keeps a cool head under pressure and even though he would vehemently deny it, he’s secretly an optimist. He kisses my forehead and can make me smile even when the world is crashing down around me.

Who we are: We have been together for nearly three years now. We got engaged March 29, 2011 and we are now planning a nerdy punk rock wedding for June 2013. We go to tons of shows (Mr. Mogwai has been active in the punk scene for over a decade), but we can have just as much fun staying at home watching Star Trek or playing Guitar Hero. Despite our age difference, we agree on the issues that matter to us, political and religious. Our strengths compliment the other’s weaknesses, and no matter what we support each other in whatever we attempt. He kisses my forehead and reminds me how much he loves me every chance he gets. I can’t wait to start our life together.

I guess when I tell you the story of our wedding, I should start from the very beginning. This will be the first in a (relatively long) series of posts detailing our planning process and the journey from being boyfriend and girlfriend to husband and wife. I’ll be publishing these stories as Miss Mogwai (just like I am on the WeddingBee bios) so try not to get too confused. It should be interesting, so sit down, buckle up, and enjoy the ride.

Love always,

Miss Mogwai

(I’m also posting my story on the WeddingBee bios section.)